Helping women at work starts with saying something

October 30, 2017 01:00 AM

Sharon Silke Carty is a news editor at Automotive News

We got a lot of email last week following the publication of our survey of women in the auto industry, which we called Project XX. A lot of women thanked us for talking openly about the issues they face every day.

But one email that stuck with me came from a male friend who recounted an evening out after the Paris auto show a few years ago. He was standing in the hotel bar with several male colleagues, and a female colleague who was passing through the lobby on her way back to her room popped in to say goodnight to everyone.

The conversation was warm, everyone all smiles, happy in the way people are when they get to visit Europe, eat lavishly and drink fancy wines on the corporate tab. One of the men in the group put his arm around the woman's shoulders, and then, in front of everyone, he reached over and grabbed her breast.

My friend was struck not only by that brazen act, but what happened next: The woman lifted the man's arm off her shoulder, ducked away from him, quickly said goodnight and walked out of the bar. Her reaction, my friend said, seemed swift and automatic.

Like maybe this had happened to her before, and she knew what to do.

None of the other men in the group addressed what happened. They just went back to drinking. And maybe reassured themselves with the knowledge that they were one of the good guys, and they would never be that slimy.

If you read the Project XX stories last week and are wondering what you can do to make things better for women in the workplace, I have a starting point piece of advice that I stole from Homeland Security: If you see something, say something.

Say something like, "Dude, that was really gross, and you owe her an apology."

Say something like, "If you want to report him to HR, I will back you up."

Say something like, "I saw this happen, and I need to tell someone else in the company so we can figure out how to handle it."

Culture can change. But it takes work, and it takes people talking about the hard issues. So if you see something, say something.